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The Wifi Passwords of Your Favorite Literary Characters

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Vivienne Woodward

Contributor

Vivienne Woodward lives in Philly and works as the events coordinator for an indie bookstore. She can often be found drinking too much coffee in the sunny spot on her couch and over-identifying with fictional characters. She enjoys collecting hobbies, dancing to radio pop, and rearranging the book stacks on her side tables.

What’s in a wifi password? Well, either it’s a nonsensical set of numbers and letters that you have to send your guests crawling to the box behind your couch in order to find or, if given the opportunity to create your own, it’s a small window into your soul. The combination of words and letters and symbols that safeguards your lifeline: the internet. Are you going to make a small joke with your password, to amuse your guests who want to briefly connect to your network? Or will you simply turn to the first thing that crosses your mind (very telling in and of itself)? Or will your wifi password reveal something even deeper…a phrase or a code that offers a glimpse into the recesses of your brain, perhaps because you forgot that from time to time guests will arrive at your door and it will be the first thing they demand of you, their host?

Most of us never expect anyone beyond those we have invited into our homes to know how we secure our most prized possession (again: the internet). But, a new leak from Internet Company™ revealed the wifi passwords of some of your most beloved character companions. See below for a glimpse into the psyches of these 20 fictional friends:

Bernadette, Where’d You Go, Bernadette: manjulaisthisthingON?

Stephen Florida, Stephen Florida: wrestling123

Ayoola, My Sister the Serial Killer: IWannaDanceWithSomebody:)

Hans Vollman, Lincoln in the Bardo: bardowithahardo

Sportcoat, Deacon King Kong: hotsausagencheese

Ignatious C. Reilly, A Confederacy of Dunces: thiswifiissealedtoyoucapricioussprite!

Narrator, Chemistry: 321ChEmIsTrY123!

Dimmesdale, The Scarlet Letter: thekidisnotmyson

Alice, Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland: maycauseshrinkage

Stevens, The Remains of the Day: YouAreMostWelcomeToThisWifiChannel2

Sauron, The Lord of the Rings: EyeCUDoUCMe?

Ishmael, Moby Dick: CallMeMaybe?

Sethe, Beloved: iseedeadpeople

Lauren Olamina, Earthseed Series: sowtalented

Joe Goldberg, You: 321…YOU

Keiko, Convenience Store Woman: $trangerThing$

Dr Henry Jekyll/Mr Edward Hyde, Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde: WelcomeFrien…BEGONE

Lila Mae Watson, The Intuitionist: upupandaway

Napoleon, Animal Farm: wantathingdonewell?DIY

Daisy Buchanan, The Great Gatsby: beautifulanddirtyrich

Interested in more of the internet tendencies of your fictional friends? Right this way.