100 Must-Read Sex Education Books (for Grown-Ups)

Today’s post is sponsored by Rough and Tumble by Rhenna Morgan.

A self-made man with his fingers in a variety of successful businesses, Jace Kennedy lives for the challenge and he always gets what he wants. From the start, he sees Vivienne Moore’s hidden wild side and knows she’s his perfect match, if only he can break it free. He can walk society’s walk and talk society’s talk, but when he wants something, he finds a way to get it. He’s proud of who he is and where he came from, and he’ll be damned if he lets Vivienne go before showing her the safest place of all is in the arms of a dangerous man.


Before we jump into this list I would like to tell you a bit about what this list is and what it is not. First of all, it is by no means comprehensive. This list was made with adults in mind; it is not a list of sex education books for kids nor is it a list of books on how to talk to your kids about sex. This list also does not include books on dating or relationships, save a few, and I intentionally have not included memoirs. It is broken into primary categories while fully acknowledging that most of these books fit into multiple categories. To be honest, most of these books are cisgender-centric and heteronormative and the language is often ableist and generally non-inclusive and though I tried very hard to find authors of color, there are few and far between that have published sex ed books. This is very much a problem in what is published in sex ed right now. This is not indicative of every book on the list and these books have good information for all types of people but a lot of the language encountered is going to be problematic. This aside, it is still a useful and necessary list. I would also like to add in full disclosure that I am a sex educator and a number of the authors on this list are friends, colleagues, people I have taught, and people I have learned from. They also have happened to write thoughtful and informative books about sex.

General

  1. S.E.X., second edition: The All-You-Need-To-Know Sexuality Guide to Get You Through Your Teens and Twenties by Heather Corinna: “Whatever your gender or sexual identity, whether you’ve already been actively exploring your sexuality or are only just getting curious, S.E.X. clearly spells out what you need and want to know no shame, no judgement, just comprehensive and accurate info in a clear, straightforward language.”
  2. Girl Sex 101 by Allison Moon and kd diamond: “Girl Sex 101 is a sex-ed book like no other, offering helpful info for ladies and lady-lovers of all genders and identities, playful and informative illustrations on each page, and over 100 distinct voices, plus a hot narrative that shows you how to put the info to good use!”
  3. Guide To Getting It On, 8th Edition by Paul Joannides Psy.D. and Daerick Gröss Sr.: “The only book where it’s almost as much fun to read about sex as it is to have sex. And it just keeps getting better.”
  4. The Joy of Sex: The Ultimate Revised Edition by Alex Comfort: “The Joy of Sex revolutionized how we experience our sexuality. An international bestseller since it was first published in 1972, Dr. Alex Comfort’s classic work dared to celebrate the joy of human physical intimacy with such authority and candor that a whole generation felt empowered to enjoy sex. Now fully updated, revised, and reillustrated, The Joy of Sex once again sets the standard as the world’s most trusted sex manual.”
  5. The Sex & Pleasure Book: Good Vibrations Guide to Great Sex for Everyone by Carol Queen, Ph.D. and Shar Rednour: “Good Vibrations Staff Sexologist Carol Queen PhD and Author, Editor Femmepress Shar Rednour have collaborated on a tome that aims to demystify sex and offer enough fun, detailed knowledge to make solo or sociable sex fabulous for just about everyone. Covering everything from sexual identity to relationships, sex through the lifespan to pregnancy and health issues, disability to sex and tech, and tons of information about sexual practices, positions, and of course toys!”
  6. Moregasm: Babeland’s Guide to Mind-Blowing Sex by Rachel Venning, Claire Cavanah, and Jessica Vitkus: “Easing anxiety about bodily pleasure, Moregasm is for women of all ages and the men (and women) who love them. Detailed and comprehensive, it’s an exuberant and friendly manual of modern sex, filled with stylish photographs and illustrations, questions, suggestions, personal stories from real people, and easy to follow advice.”
  7. The Explorer’s Guide to Planet Orgasm: for every body (April 20, 2017) by Annie Sprinkle Ph.D., Yu Dori, Beth Stephens Ph.D.: “On Planet Orgasm, there are dozens of kinds of orgasms, just waiting for us all to have them. You can take Orgasmanaut Training, learn the fascinating history of orgasm research, expand your definition of orgasm, and voyage into undiscovered orgasmic lands. You’ll discover orgasms for people of every gender and orientation: big world-shaking orgasms and gentle mini-gasms; orgasms in every part of your body; orgasms by yourself, orgasms with toys, orgasms with others… and orgasms only you can discover for yourself.”
  8. Nina Hartley’s Guide to Total Sex by Nina Hartley: “Legendary porn star Nina Hartley’s guide to thrilling, liberating, mind-blowing, soul-fulfilling, and intimacy-building sex!”
  9. Sex For Dummies by Sabine Walter and Pierre A. Lehu: “Looking for the straight facts on sex? In this friendly, authoritative guide, renowned sex therapist Dr. Ruth gives you the latest on everything from oral sex and popular positions to new methods of birth control. She also debunks sex myths and covers new therapies to manage low libido, overcome sexual dysfunction, and enhance pleasure.”
  10. Guide To Getting It On: Unzipped (February 14, 2017) by Paul Joannides Psy.D.: “I originally wrote this book for people who wanted to have better sex. But then it started winning awards and being used in college sex-ed courses. So I tried to make the book all things to all people, and it started to grow, and grow, and grow. But with this new edition, I’ve taken the Guide To Getting It On back to its roots. It is 624 pages, which is half the page count of the previous edition.”
  11. Sex: How To Do Everything by Emma Taylor, Lorelei Sharkey, Em & Lo: “In a totally fresh and appealing take on the subject, SEX is a completely new kind of sex book. This is a sex book for people who like having sex, who want to have more, and want to know how to do everything better. Unlike other sex manuals, which try to solve problems with sex, this is a book for people who love sex and want to expand their horizons.”

LGBTQIA and Gender

  1. Trans Bodies, Trans Selves: A Resource for the Transgender Community by Laura Erickson-Schroth: “A revolutionary resource-a comprehensive, reader-friendly guide for transgender people, with each chapter written by transgender or genderqueer authors. Inspired by Our Bodies, Ourselves, the classic and powerful compendium written for and by women, Trans Bodies, Trans Selves is widely accessible to the transgender population, providing authoritative information in an inclusive and respectful way and representing the collective knowledge base of dozens of influential experts.”
  2. Transgender 101: A Simple Guide to a Complex Issue 1st Edition by Nicholas M Teich: “Written by a social worker, popular educator, and member of the transgender community, this well-rounded resource combines an accessible portrait of transgenderism with a rich history of transgender life and its unique experiences of discrimination.”
  3. The Bisexual’s Guide to the Universe: Quips, Tips, and Lists for Those Who Go Both Ways by Nicole Kristal and Mike Szymanski: “Double your chances for a date this weekend with the ultimate handbook. Organized by experience level, this no-holds-barred, irreverent guide is for anyone—bisexual, queer, pansexual, or none of the above—who wants the best of both worlds. Increase your Bi-Q now!”
  4. The Invisible Orientation: An Introduction to Asexuality by Julie Sondra Decker: “Julie Sondra Decker outlines what asexuality is, counters misconceptions, provides resources, and puts asexual people’s experiences in context as they move through a very sexualized world. It includes information for asexual people to help understand their orientation and what it means for their relationships, as well as tips and facts for those who want to understand their asexual friends and loved ones.”
  5. Between XX and XY: Intersexuality and the Myth of Two Sexes by Gerald N. Callahan: “In this eye-opening exploration of the science of sex, Gerald N. Callahan, PhD, challenges our notion of two opposite sexes. Human sex is more than it appears to be. Using a brief history of sex from the ancient Greeks to the geneticists of the twentieth century, he shows us how our understanding of the sexual development of human beings is constantly evolving.”
  6. The Whole Lesbian Sex Book: A Passionate Guide for All of Us by Felice Newman: “The Whole Lesbian Sex Book was the first-ever sex guide to offer information and encouragement for all women who desire women — lesbian, bisexual, butch, femme, androgynous, and transgender. First published in 1999, it has been lauded for its thoroughness, enthusiastic tone, and creative, nonjudgmental approach to lesbian sex in all its rich variety. Now, five years later, sex educator Felice Newman has completely updated this classic guide.”
  7. Fucking Trans Women (FTW) (Volume 1) by Mira Bellwether: “FTW is a zine by trans women, about the sex lives of trans women. It is an educational and instructional tool as much as it is a creative exploration of how we have sex.”
  8. Asexuality: A Brief Introduction by Asexuality Archive: “Sometimes called “A Fourth Orientation”, asexuality is a sexual orientation characterized by a persistent lack of sexual attraction toward any gender. This book explores love, sex, and life, from the asexual point of view.”
  9. Miss Vera’s Cross Gender Fun for All by Dr. Veronica Vera: “‘Within every man there is a woman; within every woman there is a man,’ says Dr. Veronica Vera, founder of Miss Vera’s Finishing School for Boys Who Want to Be Girls. In this, the first book ever about cross-gender play for people of all identities and sexes, Dr. Vera presents the importance of cross-gender play as a method of self-discovery and growth.”
  10. The Transgender Teen: A Handbook for Parents and Professionals Supporting Transgender and Non-Binary Teens by Stephanie A. Brill and Lisa Kenney: “Is it just a phase, a fad, or a real issue with your teen? This comprehensive guidebook explores the unique challenges that thousands of families face every day raising a teenager who may be transgender, gender-variant or gender-fluid.”
  11. The Transgender Child: A Handbook for Families and Professionals by Stephanie A. Brill, Rachel Pepper: “This comprehensive first of its kind guidebook explores the unique challenges that thousands of families face every day raising their children in every city and state. Through extensive research and interviews, as well as years of experience working in the field, the authors cover gender variance from birth through college.”
  12. The Joy of Gay Sex, Revised & Expanded Third Edition by Charles Silverstein and Felice Picano: “Invaluable as a sex guide, a resource on building self-esteem, and a trusted aid for coming out of the closet, The Joy of Gay Sex covers the ins and outs of gay life alphabetically from “anus” to “wrestling.” Noted psychologist Dr. Charles Silverstein has collaborated once again with critically acclaimed novelist Felice Picano on this third edition, updating every single entry and adding nearly thirty new entries.”
  13. The Drag King Book by Judith “Jack” Halberstam and Del LaGrace Volcano: “First book on drag kings–women who dress up as men.”
  14. The Lazy Crossdresser by Charles Anders: “The author is a crossdresser of many years’ experience, gives you the skills and confidence you need to crossdress as much–or as little–as you want! Unlike crossdressing manuals that insist on nothing less than perfect passable femininity, these pages give you permission to experiment!”

Cis-centric (cis is defined as non-trans and non-genderqueer)

  1. Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science that Will Transform Your Sex Life by Emily Nagoski Ph.D.: “An essential exploration of why and how women’s sexuality works—based on groundbreaking research and brain science—that will radically transform your sex life into one filled with confidence and joy.”
  2. Our Bodies, Ourselves by Boston Women’s Health Book Collective and Judy Norsigian: “Hailed by The New York Times as a “feminist classic,” and “America’s bestselling book on women’s health,” the comprehensive guide to all aspects of women’s health and sexuality, including menopause, birth control, childbirth, sexual health, sexual orientation, gender identity, mental health and general well-being.”
  3. She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring a Woman by Ian Kerner: “Ian Kerner offers a radical new philosophy for pleasuring women in She Comes First—an essential guidebook to oral sex from the author of Be Honest—You’re Not That Into Him Either. The New York Times praises Kerner’s ‘cool sense of humor and an obsessive desire to inform,’ as he ‘encourages men through an act that many find mystifying.’”
  4. Vaginas: An Owner’s Manual by Carol Livoti: “An engaging, thorough, and much-needed explanation of the working vagina, Vaginas is a book of accessible facts written by down-to-earth authors whose only agenda is female education. The authors (the mother is an ob/gyn, the daughter a writer) avoid the flowery language and feminist agenda of other books on the subject. They take readers from the mood swings of puberty to the hot flashes of menopause with warmth, humor, and candor.”
  5. Dick: A User’s Guide by Michele C. Moore and Caroline de Costa: “Whether you own one or are close with someone who does, it’s pretty easy to recognize the importance of the penis. But in fact there is next to no reliable information on nearly every man’s and many women’s favorite little friend. Now, in Dick, two women doctors boldly provide readers with a much-needed handbook that guides, educates, and dispels all the common misconceptions about the penis.”
  6. The Multi-Orgasmic Couple: Sexual Secrets Every Couple Should Know by Mantak Chia, Maneewan Chia, Douglas Abrams, and Rachel Carlton Abrams: “A classic work on human sexuality, The Multi-Orgasmic Couple —along with The Multi-Orgasmic Man and The Multi-Orgasmic Woman, the other volumes in the ground-breaking trilogy—is the first popular, accessible book designed to help sexual partners achieve new levels of sensual pleasure and intimacy.”
  7. The New Male Sexuality, Revised Edition by Bernie Zilbergeld: “The New Male Sexuality addresses the most urgent questions of men today–and of the women who love them. Bernie Zilbergeld reports findings from his twenty years as a psychologist specializing in human sexuality, as well as those other experts in the field, and shares his own and his clients’ experiences.”
  8. I Love Female Orgasm: An Extraordinary Orgasm Guide by Dorian Solot and Marshall Miller: “I Love Female Orgasm is crammed with everything you want to know about the big O, including: How to have an orgasm during intercourse-and why most women don’t, Directions on finding your way to the G-spot, Detailed advice on how to have your first orgasm, Advice for better oral sex, Tips on surfing waves of multiple orgasms (even if you usually have just one) and more!”

Aging

  1. Ultimate Guide to Sex after Fifty: How to Maintain or Regain a Spicy, Satisfying Sex Life by Joan Price (Available for Kindle or from book resellers): “Her definitive guide to sex and aging has it all: medical challenges, loss of libido, loss of intimacy, dating, elusive orgasms, erectile dysfunction, vaginal pain, self-pleasuring, sex toys, kink, and more. The Ultimate Guide to Sex After Fifty delivers solid, practical information in a friendly, accessible style to help all genders and orientations, partnered or unpartnered, enjoy their sexuality for the rest of their lives.”

Female Ejaculation and G-Spot

  1. The Smart Girl’s Guide to the G-Spot by Violet Blue: “It’s not a myth, it’s a miracle, the G-spot, that powerhouse of female orgasm. With wit and panache, sex educator and best-selling writer Violet Blue helps readers master the sexual alphabet through G. Beginning with an anatomical guide and incorporating suggestions for couple-play, positions, toys, and safer sex, The Smart Girl’s Guide to the G-Spot will lead to thrilling new sensations and earth-shaking, bed-breaking, gale force climaxes.”

Oral Sex

  1. The Ultimate Guide to Cunnilingus by Violet Blue: “Truly the bible of oral sex, The Ultimate Guide to Cunnilingus gives excellent advice, encouragement, and helpful instruction to those who want to expand their expertise or are simply curious about the art’s finer points. In her clear, concise, and informative text, sex educator Violet Blue provides step-by-step instructions for going down on a woman, as well as accurate and up-to-date information on female anatomy and sexual response.”
  2. The Ultimate Guide to Fellatio by Violet Blue: “With wit, expertise, and an enthusiastic approach, Violet Blue dispels myths and delivers essential information on going down on a man. Every tip, trick, and technique for giving skilled and unforgettable fellatio is provided. From talking to your partner about oral sex to male pleasure spots, Violet Blue covers it all in this complete step-by-step guide.”

Hand Sex

  1. A Hand in the Bush: The Fine Art of Vaginal Fisting by Deborah Addington: “Vaginal fisting – the intimate, potent sexual act of gradually inserting the entire hand into the vagina is an increasingly popular form of sexplay among lesbians, bisexuals and heterosexuals alike. Now, for the first time, an experienced fister and fistee explains in detail how to fist with the greatest possible safety and pleasure.”
  2. How to Give a Hand Job That Will Blow His Mind by Sam Jones: “Are you looking for new ways to spice up your sex life? Have you tried to give a hand job only to discover it can be tiring and boring? If so, this book will teach you new techniques that will allow you to become an expert in pleasuring your lover with your hands. With 34 different moves you will definitely find the ones that please you both.”

Solo Sex (Masturbation) and Fantasy

  1. Sex For One: The Joy of Selfloving by Bettie Dodson: “For more than 20 years, Betty Dodson has been dedicated to taking the shame out of masturbation, showing it to be a healthy form of sexual expression. With warmth and intelligence, and informative line drawings, Dodson explains how anyone can learn to fully enjoy the pleasures of self-love, pointing out that masturbation is still the safest sex.”
  2. The Ultimate Guide to Sexual Fantasy: How to Have Incredible Sex with Role Play, Sex Games, Erotic Massage, BDSM and More by Violet Blue: “With wit and enthusiasm, sex educator Violet Blue takes readers on a tour of the wide world of sexual fantasies, offering expert advice for talking dirty to a partner, playing with toys and dress-up, making homemade porn, and exploring fetishes, sex scenes, phone sex, and much more. Packed with tons of games, resources, and lots of fun, The Ultimate Guide to Sexual Fantasy is the perfect book for daring readers who want to safely turn their sexual fantasies into reality.”
  3. The Ultimate Guide to Solo Sex by Jenny Block: “Masturbation is a many-splendored thing, but even here, all of us can get into a comfortable rut. Take what can be really good to really great with Jenny Block’s guide to getting it on with yourself. Whether you are happily coupled, on your own, poly, or demonstrating your solo skills for your lover(s), Block has the very best advice on how to pleasure yourself masterfully and share the love.”
  4. 131 Sex Games & Erotic Role Plays for Couples: Have Hot, Wild, & Exciting Sex, Fulfill Your Sexual Fantasies, & Put the Spark Back in Your Relationship with These Naughty Scenarios by Elizabeth Cramer: “The erotic role plays contained in this book will allow you to explore each other’s fantasies, fetishes and desires. They have been placed in thematic sections, so you can go immediately to a particular section, or just browse each section as you get to it.”

Aural Sex

  1. 131 Dirty Talk Examples: Learn How To Talk Dirty with These Simple Phrases That Drive Your Lover Wild & Beg You For Sex Tonight by Elizabeth Cramer: “In this guide you will learn 131 tried-and-tested, proven-to-work phrases you can use for getting your partner in the mood, during foreplay, during & after love making. Both for-man & for-woman phrases are included. You will learn many ways to get started talking dirty and how to build it up gradually so you are comfortable & sound confident when you say them. Using correctly they will make your lover addicted to your voice & drive him/her wild in bed.”
  2. Dirty Talk: Learn Simple Sexy Phrases To Ignite Your Sexual Life And Make Your Wildest Fantasies Come True! By Lizzie Harris: “Dirty talk is a bit forbidden. It even has the word “dirty” in it, after all. Taboo, unconventional, naughty, and dirty things can often intrigue us and pique our sexual curiosity. So how do you talk dirty without feeling awkward or ruining the mood? This book can help you heighten your sexual experiences with a little naughty language and conversation.”
  3. How To Talk Dirty: A How To Talk Dirty Guide That Will Make Your Partner Beg For You! by Jennifer Amor: “In this guide, you will learn exactly how to talk dirty and how to do it right. You will discover what dirty talking is, the science of it, as well as the art of putting your own creative spin on the age-old hobby of talking your lover off. It takes you, step by step, from getting in the mood, during foreplay, during love making, to afterglow.”
  4. Dirty Talk: Unleash Excitement And Desire With Over 100 Examples And Tips by Adriano Valentino: “Is your love life becoming more of the same old routine, and you would like to revive the passion in sex? Or if simply to turn on your lover and yourself like CRAZY to achieve many more MIND BLOWING orgasms, then this book is for you! By learning many different ways to “Talk Dirty” in person, phone calling, and texting (Or “Sexting as its known”) and how to apply it in the CORRECT WAYS, you will become way more desirable as well as enjoy sex SO MUCH better!”

Anal

  1. Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women by Tristan Taormino (Available for Kindle or from book resellers): “An essential how-to for beginners and a valuable reference for enthusiasts! “The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women” offers comprehensive information on all aspects of anal eroticism and health.”
  2. The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Men by Bill Brent (Available from book resellers): “All aspects of anal eroticism and health for men who want to learn how to enjoy anal sex in a healthy, responsible way are covered in this insightful book. Helpful suggestions for building trust and talking with a partner, tips on safety and hygiene are also covered as well as a complete resource guide including videos, books, and websites.”
  3. The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure: Erotic Exploration for Men and Their Partners by Charlie Glickman, Ph.D. and Aislinn Emirzian: “Growing numbers of men and their partners are enhancing their sex lives with prostate play. The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure offers men erotic pleasure beyond what they imagined possible.”

Positions

  1. Curvy Girl Sex: 101 Body-Positive Positions to Empower Your Sex Life by Elle Chase: “Who says you have to be a size 6 to have the best sex of your life? Curvy Girl Sex is here to show you that regardless of size, shape, or flexibility you CAN get creative and have satisfying, sultry, sensual sex! Sex educator Elle Chase covers sex positions from basic to advanced, specific challenges faced as plus-sized lovers, and precise tips, tricks and techniques that cater to your big, beautiful body.”
  2. The Little Black Book of Sex Positions by Dan Baritchi and Jennifer Baritchi: “If you think there are only three positions that get the job done, then it’s time to get out of your sexual rut and start having a ball! The Little Black Book of Sex Positions exposes in glorious detail hundreds of sexy moves that can lead to mind-blowing ecstasy for you and your lover.”
  3. Sex Positions: The top sex positions with images; the Ultimate Sex Guide by Fernando Sanz and Nancy Sanz: “Take you sex life to the next level with the best positions. Orgasms guaranteed Sex positions. We are surrounded by sex in our daily lives. It’s on the street, on television, even while we are online, or especially if we are online. But sometimes when it comes down to our own sexual life, we just take it for granted, or we just don’t know how to make the most out of the intimate time with our partner. This book is precisely about that. It’s about how to have better, more fun and pleasuring sex.”

Contraception, Pregnancy, and Fertility

  1. Contraceptive Technology by Robert A. Hatcher: “The leading reference in reproductive health for over 30 years. Edited for ob/gyns, reproductive medicine MDs, and primary care physicians, this guide covers the details of every method of contracetion, looking at the benefits, risks, and reliability of each.”
  2. Taking Charge of Your Fertility: The Definitive Guide to Natural Birth Control, Pregnancy Achievement, and Reproductive Health by Toni Weschler: “Since the publication of Taking Charge of your Fertility two decades ago, Toni Weschler has taught a whole new generation of women how to become pregnant, avoid pregnancy naturally and gain better control of their gynecological and sexual health by taking just a couple minutes a day using the proven Fertility Awareness Method.”
  3. The Ultimate Guide to Sex Through Pregnancy and Motherhood: Passionate Practical Advice for Moms by Madison Young: “In this guide, sex educator and filmmaker Madison Young satisfies the curiosity of any woman who has ever wanted to know how to negotiate sexual desires safely during pregnancy, learn how to embrace her inner pregnant sex goddess, and discover the ultimate sex positions for all stages of pregnancy.”
  4. Managing Contraception 2016 by Mimi Zieman: “This is the newest, limited edition of Managing Contraception. It is 33% larger than past editions, measuring 4 ¾” X 7 ¼”.”
  5. Family Planning: A Global Handbook for Providers by Johns Hopkins University and World Health Organization: “Evidence-based Guidance Developed Through Worldwide Collaboration: The new 2011 edition, Family Planning: A Global Handbook for Providers, offers clinic-based health care professionals in developing countries the latest guidance on providing contraceptive methods. See a summary of recent revisions.”

Disability and Sex

  1. The Ultimate Guide to Sex and Disability: For All of Us Who Live with Disabilities, Chronic Pain, and Illness by Cory Silverberg and Miriam Kaufman: “The Ultimate Guide to Sex and Disability is the first complete sex guide for people who live with disabilities, pain, illness, or chronic conditions. Useful for absolutely everyone, regardless of age, gender, or sexual orientation, the book addresses a wide range of disabilities ? from chronic fatigue, back pain, and asthma to spinal cord injury, hearing and visual impairment, multiple sclerosis, and more.”

Sexual Dysfunction

  1. Sexual Dysfunction, Third Edition: A Guide for Assessment and Treatment by John P. Wincze, Ph.D. and Risa B. Weisburg, Ph.D.: “Highly regarded as a course text and practitioner resource, this book presents concise intervention guidelines for the most frequently encountered sexual dysfunctions in women and men. Following a consistent format, chapters on each clinical problem cover its description, clinical presentation, prevalence, etiology, and biological and psychosocial factors.”

Relationship Styles

  1. The Ethical Slut: A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy: “The essential guide for singles and couples who want to explore polyamory in ways that are ethically and emotionally sustainable.”
  2. Designer Relationships: A Guide to Happy Monogamy, Positive Polyamory, and Optimistic Open Relationships by Mark A. Michaels and Patricia Johnson: “Best-selling authors and nationally known relationship experts Patricia Johnson and Mark A. Michaels are exemplars of this life choice, and have studied polyamory for over 20 years. This book explains exactly how you and your loved ones can design your own life and love.”
  3. Opening Up: A Guide to Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships by Tristan Taormino: “Relationship expert and bestselling author Tristan Taormino offers a bold new strategy for creating loving, lasting relationships. Drawing on in-depth interviews with over a hundred women and men, Opening Up explores the real-life benefits and challenges of all styles of open relationships ? from partnered non-monogamy to solo polyamory.”

BDSM, Kink, and Fetishes

  1. The Seductive Art of Japanese Bondage by Midori and Craig Morey: “From ornately decorative to excruciatingly stringent, Japanese rope bondage is an art which has developed over centuries of martial and erotic practice. Now, accomplished Japanese-born educator and bondage practitioner, Midori shows step by step how to achieve beautiful and exciting Japanese bondage on a variety of genders and body types.”
  2. The New Topping Book by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy: “The original Topping Book, published in 1994, overnight became an essential manual for tops, dominants, owners, trainers, masters, mistresses and more.”
  3. The New Bottoming Book by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy: “Almost a decade ago, the first Bottoming Book taught tens of thousands of people that bottoming – being a submissive, masochist, slave, ‘boy’ or ‘girl, ‘ or other BDSM recipient — is as much an art as topping. Since then, the growing popularity of BDSM, and the blossoming of the Internet as a source of information and connection, have created a whole new universe of possibilities for players. Now, the completely updated revised New Bottoming Book gives even more insights and ideas, updated for a new millennium, about how to be a successful, popular bottom!”
  4. When Someone You Love is Kinky by Dossie Easton and Catherine A. Liszt: “When Someone You Love Is Kinky to help “non-kinky” folks understand and communicate with their kinky friends, partners, and relatives. Included are guidelines for dealing with the emotional turmoil of the coming-out process; brief and non-threatening descriptions of the commonest kinks (and ideas about why people enjoy them); suggestions for how to talk to your kinky friend or relative in ways that promote good communication; explanation of how kinky people keep themselves safe while exploring diverse sexualities; a glossary of commonly used terminology from the kink communities; a resource guide to help the reader find further information and support.”
  5. The Heart of Dominance: a guide to practicing consensual dominance by Anton Fulmen: “The Heart of Dominance is a how-to guide to the concepts and skills at the heart of consensual dominance. If you are new to dominance, still figuring out just what it’s all about or what you want it to mean to you, then this book will provide you with a solid foundation from which to start. If you already practice dominance and are interested in improving your ability to create deep and lasting power dynamics then you’ll find many advanced concepts and concrete techniques to integrate into your own personal style.”
  6. Fetish Sex: A Complete Guide to Sexual Fetishes by Violet Blue: “In plain and playful language, bestselling author Violet Blue shows readers how to enjoy sexual fetishes as a healthy sex toy just like any other, no matter how ordinary or unusual. This completely revised, updated and expanded second edition makes Fetish Sex the most complete book on sexual fetishes available.”
  7. The Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM, Role Play and the Erotic Edge by Tristan Taormino: “The Ultimate Guide to Kink is the first major guide to BDSM in a generation?a bold and sexy collection of essays that run the gamut from expert how-to tutorials to provocative essays that delve into complex questions about desire, power, and pleasure. The book brings together diverse voices from the kink community in an unprecedented way: each chapter is written by a different sexuality/BDSM educator.”
  8. SM 101: A Realistic Introduction by Jay Wiseman: “The long-taboo subject of consensual BDSM (bondage/discipline,dominance/submission, sadomasochism) is coming “out of the closet” – much to the delight of the millions of adults who enjoy engaging in bondage, spanking, erotic role-playing and similar consensual practices.”
  9. The Sexually Dominant Woman: A Workbook for Nervous Beginners by Lady Green: “This friendly, non-threatening book is the perfect starting point for the woman who has fantasized about erotic power play, explaining the fundamentals of bondage, sensation and control games. It includes a script to inspire and support the novice through her first scene, a new section on partner-finding skills and updated information on the possible emotional effects of female-dominant play.”
  10. Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns: The Romance and Sexual Sorcery of Sadomasochism by Philip Miller and Molly Devon: “The classic guide to sadomasochism by two experienced players. This unabashed, entertaining book strips away myth, shame and fear, revealing the truth about an intense form of eroticism too long misunderstood and condemned. It is fully indexed and includes over 225 photos and illustrations, a 250-plus word glossary, appendices with over 650 contacts for SM related clubs, stores, craftspeople and literature.”
  11. Two Knotty Boys Showing You The Ropes: A Step-by-Step, Illustrated Guide for Tying Sensual and Decorative Rope Bondage: “When Two Knotty Boys, Dan and J. D., began teaching rope bondage together in 1999, they discovered that most people learn best when they’re shown — close up, step by step, and repeatedly — how to tie basic knots and combine them into bondage techniques. It is this learning process that they duplicate in this book.”
  12. Enough To Make You Blush: Exploring Erotic Humiliation by Princess Kali: “Erotic humiliation goes far beyond the “Lick my boots!” stereotype. Princess Kali, a famous former Dominatrix and world-renowned Humiliatrix, throws open the dungeon doors to explore the complex desires that fuel this kind of psychological play for both dominants and submissives. Using both personal experience and extensive interviews she shares advice and detailed ideas for a broad range of embarrassing, humiliating, and degrading ways to enjoy consensual kinky fun.”
  13. The Mistress Manual: The Good Girl’s Guide to Female Dominance by Mistress Lorelei: “Are you the Nursemaid, the Governess, the Queen, the Amazon, the Goddess? How many things can you think of to do with your hairbrush… besides brushing your hair? Does the idea of your man washing dishes in the nude inspire thoughts of more than clean dishes? Then this is the book for you.”
  14. The Adult Spanking and Discipline Handbook: A Comprehensive Guide To Corporal Punishment by Governess Gemma Forbes: “Governess Gemma Forbes is one of the best known spankers you’ve probably never heard of. Intensely private, her expertise in the art and science of traditional, old-fashioned domestic discipline is known among the initiated the world over.”
  15. Shibari You Can Use: Japanese Rope Bondage and Erotic Macramé by Lee Harrington: “Japanese-style rope bondage and erotic macramé may look complicated and intimidating, but you can learn the basics of this beautiful, sexy art form today. Bondage artist and educator Lee Harrington takes you step by step through a variety of concepts and ties, giving you the tools to make aesthetically rewarding ropework.”
  16. Playing Well with Others: Your Field Guide to Discovering, Exploring and Navigating the Kink, Leather and BDSM Communities by Lee Harrington and Mollena Williams: “Whether you’re a trembling novice or a jaded expert, there’s always something new to be discovered in the endlessly changing, complex and titillating world of kink. While there are plenty of other books out there that explain how to give a spanking or tie a half-hitch, Playing Well With Others is the first book that explains kink *culture* — the munches, parties, leather bars, conferences, workshops, fetish nights, exploratoriums and all the other gatherings of kinksters that turn BDSM and leather from a bedroom predilection to a lifestyle and a community.”
  17. The Toybag Guide to Hot Wax & Temperature Play by Spectrum: “Heat and cold offer almost infinite possibilities for the devious sensualist, and Spectrum, a scientist and a personal devotee of the art, has spent many years studying ways to make temperature play safe as well as hot.”
  18. The Toybag Guide to Dungeon Emergencies by Jay Wiseman: “An essential quick reference guide to minor and major emergencies that can take place during play–from scrapes to freakouts to fires–plus how to set up a cost-effective first aid kit and other emergency supplies for the sexually adventurous.”
  19. The Toybag Guide to Clips & Clamps by Jack Rinella: “A quick reference guide to everything pinchy, from simple wooden clothespins to hand-tooled precision devices of gleaming chrome. Clamps offer a versatile spectrum of sensation to the knowledgeable player, and this book is the clamp user’s best friend.”
  20. The Toybag Guide to Canes & Caning by Janet W. Hardy: “To the uninitiated, it’s a simple stick. To the skilled player, the cane is simple, beautiful, utilitarian and intense. Janet Hardy shares a decade and a half of expertise on both ends of the cane: use, materials, construction, maintenance, different styles of application, pacing, aftercare and much more.”
  21. The Toybag Guide To Foot And Shoe Worship by Midori: “This is a handy manual to the delights of feet and footwear from Fetish Diva Midori. Includes * A guide to the varieties of feet, boots and shoes, and those who love them * How to give pleasure to feet * How to enjoy being the recipient of foot and shoe worship.”
  22. Spanking for Lovers by Janet W. Hardy: “Here, paired with famed spanking illustrator “Barb,” she offers the how-to and why-to of spanking for anyone from the beginner looking to spice up their sex life to the advanced player.

Sex Work and Pornography

  1. The Smart Girl’s Guide to Porn by Violet Blue: “In The Smart Girl’s Guide to Porn, acclaimed sex educator, sex and technology columnist, and porn-for-women expert Violet Blue offers hip, friendly, and knowledgeable advice on bringing porn into your sex life. Or, decide if it’s even right for you.”
  2. Paying For It by Greta Christina: “A consumer handbook and etiquette guide, “Paying For It” is the first how-to book for sex work clients. Does your sex worker’s face light up when she or he sees you walk in the door? If not, “Paying For It” can make the difference between a so-so session and an hour that you’ll remember the rest of your life.”
  3. Ethical Porn for Dicks: A Man’s Guide to Responsible Viewing Pleasure by David J. Ley: “Our media is filled with confusing, polarizing messages about the dangers of porn, while at the same time sexually explicit images are pronounced in advertising and entertainment. Using a natural question/answer format for people feeling fear and shame about porn use, this accessible, funny, and well-informed book is the first one to offer men a nonjudgmental way to discover how to view and use pornography responsibly.”

Toys

  1. Oh Joy Sex Toy Volume 1 by Erika Moen and Matthew Nolan: “Oh Joy Sex Toy: Volume One is 268 pages of comics by Erika Moen and Matthew Nolan about sex, sex toy reviews, sexuality, sex education, safer sex practices, interviews with sex industry workers, AND MORE. Volume One collects the first year’s worth of content from the weekly comic Oh Joy Sex Toy.”
  2. Oh Joy Sex Toy Volume 2 by Erika Moen and Matthew Nolan: “Oh Joy Sex Toy: Volume Two is a hefty 328 pages of comics by Erika Moen and Matthew Nolan. This volume collects the second year’s worth of content from the weekly comic Oh Joy Sex Toy, covering all kinds of sex topics in the form of toy reviews, education pieces, interviews and more. With its positivity, terrible puns and diverse cast, Oh Joy Sex Toy is an indispensable resource for anybody exploring comics or their own sexuality.”
  3. Oh Joy Sex Toy Volume 3 by Erika Moen and Matthew Nolan: “In this third volume they visit a swingers’ house party, a queer porn set and cover all sorts of topics like HPV, foreskins and UTIs, in addition to the newest and oddest sex toys. Each volume is a unique dive into the world of sex, making this book a great standalone addition to your shelf whether you’re already read the rest of the series or this is your introduction.”
  4. The Adventurous Couple’s Guide to Strap-on Sex by Violet Blue: “Feeling adventurous? Sex educator and best-selling writer Violet Blue guides readers through the pleasure playground of strap-on sex for heterosexual couples.”

Other

  1. Healing Sex: A Mind-Body Approach to Healing Sexual Trauma by Staci Haines: “The first encouraging, sex-positive guide for all women survivors of sexual assault ? heterosexual, bisexual, lesbian, coupled, and single ? who want to reclaim their sex lives. While most books on the topic broach sexuality only to reassure women that it is all right to say “no” to unwanted sex, Healing Sex encourages women to learn how to say “yes” ? to their own desires and on their own terms.”
  2. Urban Tantra: Sacred Sex for the Twenty-First Century by Barbara Carrellas and Annie Sprinkle: “If you think sexual and spiritual bliss can’t be found in today’s fast-paced world, you haven’t experienced Urban Tantra. With a juicy mix of erotic how-to and pleasure-centered spiritual wisdom, acclaimed sex educator Barbara Carrellas radically updates the ancient practice of Tantra for modern sexual explorers desiring to push past their edge in search of the great cosmic orgasm.”
  3. Big Big Love, Revised: A Sex and Relationships Guide for People of Size (and Those Who Love Them) by Hanne Blank: “Big Big Love is the only one-stop-shopping handbook on relationships, sexuality, and big sexy confidence for people of all genders, sizes, and sexual orientations who know that a fantastic love life doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with the number on the bathroom scale. Covering everything from dating to sex toys to getting on top, this guide also features tips on navigating tricky topics like making peace with your belly, coping with weight-related prejudice, and creating a happy, satisfying sex life in a culture where no body is ever perfect enough.”
  4. Exhibitionism for the Shy: Show Off, Dress Up and Talk Hot! by Carol Queen: “Exhibitionism as a consensual erotic pleasure and a means to overcome shyness and body image issues. Featuring suggested exercises and discussions of erotic dress, talk, personas and roleplay, involving your partner, exhibitionism and the sex industry, and more. Interviews include Annie Sprinkle, Nina Hartley, Candye Kane, Juliet Anderson, Vanessa del Rio, Lily Burana, Shar Rednour, and others.”
  5. The Threesome Handbook: A Practical Guide to Sleeping with Three by Vicki Vantoch: “A step-by-step guide to realizing the American dream, The Threesome Handbook: A Practical Guide to Sleeping with Three is the first book to give tri-curious men and women the inside scoop on threesomes.”
  6. Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence by Esther Perel: “One of the world’s most respected voices on erotic intelligence, Esther Perel offers a bold, provocative new take on intimacy and sex. Mating in Captivity invites us to explore the paradoxical union of domesticity and sexual desire, and explains what it takes to bring lust home.”
  7. Kissing: The Best Tips, Techniques and Advice by Taylor D’Aotino: “Did you know…? In a recent survey, 90 percent of men and women said that they would not date someone who was a bad kisser, and 80 percent believed they could predict what a long-term relationship would be like based on a first kiss. In Kissing: The Best Tips, Techniques and Advice, relationship expert Taylor D’Aotino reveals everything you need to know to master the art of kissing.”
  8. Tantric Massage For Beginners: Discover The Best Essential Tantric Massage And Tantric Love Making Techniques! by R. Riley: “You’ll find information as to how the tantric sex movement got started over six thousand years ago, and how you can start practicing it today with your partner without feeling the pressure of having sexual intercourse! At the end of the book, you’ll be introduced to some easy and a few not so easy positions that maximize the tantric sex experience!”

Author’s Note: After this post was written I came upon this great article from Broadly which includes some additional inclusive sex education guides (link). Enjoy!

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