O Hugh Jackman! O Wolverine! An Ode in Haiku
My love Wolverine
I cannot express my love
Not in clumsy prose
It’s not the actor
For he has played many parts
Oh hai Hugh Jackman
The role Wolverine
Specifically, it’s what
Makes him win at life
Your rippling muscles
Your adamantium claws
Take off your shirt please
Can anyone think
Of a better Wolverine?
You are the hottest
Your awesome swagger
Your sideburns that just won’t quit
Shirt should be off now
You have fooled me
Into thinking Wolverine
Will live forever
You have looked the same
For a freakishly long time
Only new eye bags
Your tight black leather
Your strange kind of square brown hair
Please take off your shirt?
Oh my Hugh Jackman
What horror might have happened
If I did not know
You have given me
The deepest insight into
Wolverine’s hotness
Your bulging biceps
Your dreamy posterior
TAKE OFF YOUR SHIRT NOW
(Thank you.)
