Humor

How Do You Like Them (Literary) Apples, Part 2: The Women

Wallace Yovetich

Staff Writer

Wallace Yovetich grew up in a home where reading was preferred to TV, playing outside was actually fun, and she was thrilled when her older brothers weren’t home so she could have a turn on the Atari. Now-a-days she watches a bit more TV, and considers sitting on the porch swing (with her laptop) “playing outside”. She still thinks reading is preferable to most things, though she’d really like to find out where her mom put that old Atari (Frogger addicts die hard). She runs a series of Read-a-Longs throughout the year (as well as posting fun bookish tidbits throughout the week) on her blog, Unputdownables. After teaching for seven years, Wallace is now an aspiring writer. Blog: Unputdownables Twitter: @WallaceYovetich

Wallace Yovetich

Staff Writer

Wallace Yovetich grew up in a home where reading was preferred to TV, playing outside was actually fun, and she was thrilled when her older brothers weren’t home so she could have a turn on the Atari. Now-a-days she watches a bit more TV, and considers sitting on the porch swing (with her laptop) “playing outside”. She still thinks reading is preferable to most things, though she’d really like to find out where her mom put that old Atari (Frogger addicts die hard). She runs a series of Read-a-Longs throughout the year (as well as posting fun bookish tidbits throughout the week) on her blog, Unputdownables. After teaching for seven years, Wallace is now an aspiring writer. Blog: Unputdownables Twitter: @WallaceYovetich

Last week, I compared male actors to male authors… showing the world that we (writers) got game. This week it’s about the ladies. I’m not going to focus as much on the looks (it can be argued that female actors have more to worry about concerning their looks than their male counterparts, so I’m not going to add to that already-created madness). Instead, I’m going to show you that not only can our female writers hold a mere flame to the female actors’ beauty, they can hold an entire fireplace.

When I was just a little girl
I asked my mother what will I be?
Will I be pretty, will I be rich
Here’s what she said to me.

Que Sera, Sera
Both rich and pretty, you’ll be.
And fame will come too, you’ll see.
Que Sera, Sera.

You’ve got Industry-Cross-Over-Do-Gooders? We’ve got Industry-Cross-Over-Do-Gooders.

You've got Industry-Cross-Over-Do-Gooders? We've got Industry-Cross-Over-Do-Gooders.

You’ve got the lady who Pretended-To-Be-Bridget-Jones? We’ve got the lady who Created-Bridget-Jones.

You've got the lady who Pretended-To-Be-Bridget-Jones? We've got the lady who Created-Bridget-Jones.

 

You have someone who puts their heart, body, and soul into their work. We have someone who is the DEFINITION of putting their heart, body, and soul into their work.

You have someone who puts their heart, body, and soul into their work. We have someone who is the DEFINITION of putting their heart, body, and soul into their work.

 

Your Goes-Out-On-A-“Limb”-To-Find-Herself-Blondie needs lots of lawyers to test her limits. Our Goes-Out-On-A-Limb-To-Find-Herself-Blondie just needs Eleanor Roosevelt.

Your Goes-Out-On-A-"Limb"-To-Find-Herself-Blondie needs lots of lawyers to test her limits. Our Goes-Out-On-A-Limb-To-Find-Herself-Blondie just needs Eleanor Roosevelt.

 

We concede a tie between these Could-Keep-Up-With-The-Men-While-Still-Very-Much-Being-A-Woman fabulous legendary females.

We concede a tie between these Could-Keep-Up-With-The-Men-While-Still-Very-Much-Being-A-Woman fabulous legendary females.

 

Wellesley vs. Smith (if you don’t know what I’m talking about you need to watch more movies and read more books.)

Wellesley vs. Smith (if you don't know what I'm talking about you need to watch more movies and read more books.)

 

You like an Accent-With-A-Side-Of-Dimples? Check out our Accent-With-A-Side-Of-Dimples.

You like an Accent-With-A-Side-Of-Dimples? Check out our Accent-With-A-Side-Of-Dimples.

 

Sorry, we clearly win on all accounts with our Like-It-Or-Not-She’s-In-Our-Camp lady.

Sorry, we clearly win on all accounts with our Like-It-Or-Not-She's-In-Our-Camp lady.