Tag Yourself: WUTHERING HEIGHTS

• prefers Perrier to San Pellegrino
• Patronus is a honey badger
• doesn’t think it through

Heathcliff

• the archetype of the mid-20s glow up
• revenge is a dish best served at every mealtime. and for snacks
• reads Mulder/Scully fanfic
• would have an impressive Evil Laugh, but hasn’t laughed in 21 years

Hindley Earnshaw

• bitter as the driest piece of raw broccoli
• has a habit of putting “cat’s in the cradle”on repeat and crying
• unlovable misanthrope
• part of The Problem

Nelly Dean

• has written to Ask A Manager at least 9 times
• will recap an entire episode of celebrity wife swap when she hears you haven’t seen it
• spends free time thinking of new ways to say “I told you so”
• bored

Lockwood

• claims he watches Big Brother to “observe human nature”

• lives to brunch
• WILL snoop in your medicine cabinet
• insists on holding a flashlight under his face when telling a scary story

Edgar Linton

• “the cute one” in his boy band
• *tries to put a Band-Aid on a broken window*
• is thinking about taking up stamp collecting
• takes using an inside voice very seriously

Isabella Linton

• would’ve made a good Marianne Dashwood, but woke up in the wrong novel
• pretty and witty and bright and pities any girl who isn’t her tonight
• was team Edward in her twihard phase
• cautionary tale

Catherine Linton/Heathcliff/Earnshaw

• an angry porcelain doll brought to life by a mischievous wizard
• deeply affected by READ posters
• has seen some shit
• The Power of Friendship™

Linton Heathcliff

• a gollum who never got the chance to be a smeagol
• needed antibiotics, like, yesterday
• *kicks backpack and grumbles instead of carrying it*
• most convincing smile is still a grimace

Hareton Earnshaw

• “can I sit with you guys?”
• basically a tomato of shame and rage
• digs a fine ditch
• The Power of Reading™

Joseph

• bible quiz champion
• “IN MY DAY,”
• muttering or yelling, there is no in-between
• diet is 90% cabbage