When we all think about sassy characters in the Harry Potter universe, I think there’s been a giant oversight.
All hail Queen Hedwig.
“Hmm…okay, buddy. I know I’m a fantastic friend, but I don’t want to hear about your problems anymore.”
“Um, excuse me, bitch. It’s HEDWIG’s Theme not Harry’s Theme. Carry your own damn mail.”
“In case it’s not obvious, Mr. Potter, I am seriously judging you for the amount of creeping you’re doing right now.”
“Oh NO! This genius plan backfired?! I did NOT see this coming. Stealing a car is always a FANTASTIC idea. It’s not like owls are supposed to be WISE or anything. PLEASE by all means ignore the furry creature in the backseat.”
“Yes, Harry. PLEASE run straight at a brick wall with me at the front of the trolley.”
“I am fucking majestic. Look at this bad-ass plumage. Hear me roar.”
“Look at this fool.”
“You’re running into the face of danger and going after Voldemort again?! Byeeeeeeee.” (Yes, I know she comes back and saves him—but it kills her, so…)