In honor of the upcoming Shipwreck, in which writers will gleefully produce Princess Bride erotic fanfic and a live audience will vote on the winner, we have created for you our best (worst??) Princess Bride pick-up lines. Be part of the live audience on October 7 and get your ticket here — and you’re welcome.
1. You and I should be a kissing book.
2. Are you a farm boy? ‘Cause you’ve got eyes like the sea after a storm.
3. Wanna have some fun storming my castle?
4. There’s a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. It would be a pity not to motorboat yours.
5. I’ll show you why they call me Miracle Max.
6. Let’s put the ‘hump’ in ‘Humperdink’.
7. Never go in against a Sicilian when love is on the line.
8. Wanna have one year of your life sucked away?
9. Too wuv you would bwee a dweam wifin a dweam.
10. I’ll make you scream louder than a shrieking eel.
11. Want to see my Fezzik? And by Fezzik I mean my giant.
12. It is inconceivable that we’re not made for each other.
13. Let’s just say the rodents aren’t the only thing of unusual size.
14. Want to check out my sixth finger?
15. As you wish.